Friday, October 21, 2016

7 Quick Takes About The Highlights Magazine Controversy

I have been aware of 7 Quick Takes, the weekly Catholic blogging meme, for years now, but it was only when I started this blog that I realized I could probably actually start to participate. Today I want to jump in with a post about a topic that I know will resonate in the Catholic world much better than it would in the book blogging or children's librarian world. It is the issue of Highlights for Children being bullied into including same-sex parents in their children's magazines.

This controversy erupted on Facebook early this week, after a same-sex couple contacted Highlights to ask why their family is not represented in any of the stories in any of the magazines Highlights publishes. Highlights then made a statement to its page, which appears to have been deleted, but screenshots of which are available in abundance online. In the statement Highlights tries to defend itself, saying: "For much of our readership, the topic of same-sex marriage is still new, and parents are still learning how to approach the subject with their children, even the very little ones. We believe that parents know best when their family is ready to open conversation around the topic of same-sex families." When this statement did not meet the standards of those commenting to the Highlights Facebook page, a second one was published to the Highlights website. The final sentences of the second statement read as follows: "This conversation has helped us see that we can be more reflective of all kinds of families in our publications. We are committed to doing so as we plan future issues." The conversation has continued on Twitter, and it appears that Highlights will now be actively seeking submissions that represent same-sex parents. As a Catholic mom whose preschooler is obsessed with Highlights High Five, I have a lot of thoughts on this topic:  

  1. The initial statement from Highlights about its readership's inability to discuss same-sex marriage with their children was an absolute cop-out that threw many of their loyal subscribers right under the bus. That second sentence, about parents knowing best, is completely negated by the first sentence, which essentially paints conservative parents as behind-the-times bigots. Thanks to the Church, I know exactly what I want to say to my children about same-sex marriage when I decide it is time for them to learn about it, and until this week, Highlights was a publication that could support that discussion. Now, not so much. It would be nice if Highlights could have responded to their critics without perpetuating the stereotype that people who hold these beliefs are just stupid. It just adds fuel to an ever-growing fire. 
  2. Privately owned companies should not make major business decisions based on comments from Facebook bullies. I don't respect people who post nasty family-unfriendly comments to a family-friendly Facebook page in order to shame an organization into complying with its demands. I also don't respect businesses who allow themselves to be shamed into changing their entire approach overnight by a handful of disgruntled Facebook users, many of whom are not even paying customers. Highlights would have done itself a lot of favors if it had just not responded to the drama at all. 
  3. I don't believe that all people must be represented in all things. There are many publications and other materials for children that do not represent my family's values. I don't go looking to pick fights with those publications, I simply spend my energy and money elsewhere. I would love to see a family praying in church in a mainstream children's magazine, but I don't take to social media to shame magazines into giving that to me. If I really need it, I'll find a Catholic magazine that can provide it. 
  4. I am really tired of conservative families being called bigots. When Scary Mommy picked up this story, it immediately jumped on the bigot bandwagon, saying, "If people boycott your brand because they’re bigots, that is a sword you have to fall on, as far as the rest of the population of decent, inclusive humans is concerned." Contrary to this statement, which will undoubtedly be embraced by many of Scary Mommy's readers, I am quite a decent person. I can be decent, and still want my children to be protected from messages that contradict their faith when their faith is still in the early stages of its formation. I don't treat people poorly when they're in same-sex relationships, but I also don't think the Church would teach what it does about marriage if it wasn't important for me to believe it and pass it on. 
  5. I am saddened over the loss of materials for children that promote traditional family values. If Highlights caves to their Facebook commenters, my Catholic family will no longer subscribe to High Five, and I imagine many other Christian families will cancel their subscriptions as well. Once Highlights caves, it will be just a matter of time before the pressure is on other publishers, and soon, there won't be any mainstream magazines I can share with my children. Magazines are not the most major thing in the world, but it troubles me that, while America is meant to be a free country, my freedom to raise my children according to my religious beliefs is becoming increasingly relegated to my living room and my parish. 
  6. As a Catholic mom, I will be carefully monitoring all Highlights publications that come to my mailbox over the next 15 months before my subscription runs out. If objectionable content appears during that time, the magazines will be recycled and my children will never see them. After that, we will no longer subscribe to any Highlights publication. It's a shame that Highlights couldn't be left alone to conduct business according to its own moral compass, but it's a bigger shame that it couldn't stand its ground as Hobby Lobby and Chick-Fil-A have done in the past. 
  7. Sharing about this controversy on my personal Facebook afforded me a wonderful opportunity to chat privately with a friend about my beliefs. Though we did not come to agree, it was a lovely conversation and I felt truly respected and listened to, and she also said she enjoyed the discussion. I imagine that some people who have only known me casually, or in a professional context, might be shocked to discover that I am "that sort of Catholic" (the Wrong Sort, as described by And Sometimes Tea), but I hope that this realization will prompt less vitriol and more friendly, well-intentioned conversation. 
Had you heard about this controversy yet? How will your family respond? I'd love to hear what others think!

14 comments:

  1. I hadn't heard about the controversy, so thanks for pointing it out.

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    1. Well, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but you're welcome anyway!

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  2. Bah! Not on Facebook, so I hadn't seen this. I've been so happy that Highlights (all three versions) is the same high-quality magazine that I loved as a kid. Now I'll be monitoring too. But really, you should contact them with this, especially points 2 and 6.

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    1. I am planning to contact them now that I've collected my thoughts. I have seen some feedback on Facebook making points similar to mine, but Highlights has not responded. I'm just really disappointed. Highlights Hello and High Five have been such favorites of both my girls.

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    2. Just got new Highlights issue and here we go. Subtle but there, and I'm sure it won't be the last (nor the only one of the three Highlights mags to kowtow). Never heard back from contacting Highlights, but cancelling now.

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    3. *sigh* I'm disappointed that it's happening so quickly. We are subscribed to High Five, and our February issue isn't here yet, but now I will plan to intercept at the mailbox and scrutinize before passing it on to my daughter. (It's the subtlety that worries me. Kids are so impressionable, and they can internalize subtle messages without parents even realizing it sometimes.) Our subscription was a gift, and it doesn't end until January 2018, so I was hoping to get a little more enjoyment out of it. I may end up just tearing out the offending articles and allowing my daughter to read the rest. Grandma has already been asked not to renew next year. But I'm still really disappointed. We also subscribe to Ladybug, which has been great so far. I'm hoping it stays that way so we can continue receiving at least one magazine.

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    4. The High Five was okay this month; it was Highlights that had a two-dad family packing the car for a family trip. Not a main article, just one of the sidebar activities. I figure I can pass this one off as extended family or something since we've done some vacations like that. But I cancelled all three of our subscriptions, even though Hello and High Five didn't have anything objectionable yet. I'd rather just do it all at once (and let the company know how much they're losing out on) so I don't have to explain to the kids why I cancelled one and not the others. I'm so disappointed; Highlights has been consistently outstanding for so many years and I'm sad my kids have to miss out on that.

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  3. Thanks for cluing me into this controversy, as I was unaware. I have to preview everything that comes in this house!

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    1. I always read the magazines before the kids do anyway, but it never occurred to me to be looking for these themes in stories for kids under five. I'm glad to help spread awareness, though!

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  4. You could probably end your subscription right now and get a refund for the remaining term. Maybe you could ask customer service about it and impress them with how polite "bigots" can be. You never know—you might convince someone!

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    1. The subscription was a gift from Grandma, and my daughter loves it so much, I can't bring myself to cancel it early when the content is still acceptable. (I did already tell Grandma not to renew, however.) Part of me still hopes maybe they won't actually change things.

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    2. That puts a different face on it. As a grandma myself, I appreciate what you are doing. And yes, maybe they won't actually change things. It takes a few months for stuff to go through the hard-copy publishing cycle, so you may see what happens over the next nine months or so. It's kind of like the magazine is perpetually pregnant. ;-)

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  5. #1 - I guess I read Highlights' original statement in the opposite light, basically saying that they'd decided to leave it up to parents as to when and how they want to broach the topic of same-sex marriage with their kids, rather than taking it upon themselves as a magazine to educate kids in the "right" thing to believe about it.

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  6. I'm so bummed about this! We just started subscriptions to Highlights and High 5. argh!!!

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